Are you still a mother?

Yesterday I spent some time talking with a strong woman who lost her 5 1/2 year old son last year to cancer. He was her only child. My heart was breaking as she told me about his last words and moments, and how much she misses him. She also misses her identity as a mother. Are you still a mother if your only child dies? You still feel like a mother, and love like a mother. It's unfortunate that there are so many grief "myths" in society. Like, "don't talk about the person who has died because it will trigger them and make them sad." But she wants to talk about her son, and obviously she's always thinking of him anyway. People often try to give a reassuring platitude like, "you can still have other children" because these platitudes may make the speaker feel better, but they really offer no help to the grieving person. I have learned a lot about bereavement and grief in this past year. Children dying is so wrong though - I can't get used to it. And I really feel for parents who lose their children.

Speaking of mothers on a happier note, a big congratulations to my friend Magda and her husband Sebastian on little Anna Katarina - she's half Colombian and half Polish, and what a cutie!